Jump to content
The Official Site of the Montréal Canadiens
Canadiens de Montreal

Are You Ready For A Good Laugh?


rosalie52
 Share

Recommended Posts

Wacky Calls received from The Chatham-Kent, Ont. Police Dept. in 2011

Police had many calls for animals standing or running loose on roads and interfering with traffic. Those pesky critters included geese, deer, raccoons, horses, cows, foxes and one very slow-moving snapping turtle.

Officers also received several skunk calls. Among them was a skunk with its head stuck in a mayonnaise jar.

Squirrels also caused their share of trouble in 2011, including one who sparked a neighbour dispute.

A person called the cops thinking his neighbour had dug up his Bell line and cut it. It turns out the culprit was a squirrel, who had done the same thing to the wrongly accused neighbour.

Grass also caused a lot of problems between neighbours throughout the year. A man called police because his neighbour was using a different kind of grass seed than him. He wanted the officer to force his neighbour to dig it up.

Another person called police because his neighbour cut a strip of grass that belongs to the municipality. He believed the municipality should be cutting that grass and wanted police to tell his neighbour that.

Yet another man called police because when his neighbour cuts the lawn, he infringes five inches into his yard and cuts it too short.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 3.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Pittsburgh - An 18 year old man with three teenage companions rob a market of $8000 in cash, cigarettes, candy, and checks. An hour later, he posted photographs of the three teens with the loot on his social page on Facebook. The three teens were charged in juvenile court and released to their parents. The 18 year old is facing theft, burglary, and conspiracy charges.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Grass also caused a lot of problems between neighbours throughout the year. A man called police because his neighbour was using a different kind of grass seed than him. He wanted the officer to force his neighbour to dig it up.

:blink:

Pittsburgh - An 18 year old man with three teenage companions rob a market of $8000 in cash, cigarettes, candy, and checks. An hour later, he posted photographs of the three teens with the loot on his social page on Facebook. The three teens were charged in juvenile court and released to their parents. The 18 year old is facing theft, burglary, and conspiracy charges.

Wow. Very intelligent kid.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great signs Clues.

Two American tourists were visiting Wales and came across the village of Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwll-llantysiliogogogoch.They went into a restaurant and being somewhat perplexed with Welsh place names they called the blonde waitress over to their table and asked

"Can you pronounce the name of where we are.....very slowly please?"

The waitress replied "Bur-----ger------king!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't know what soccer league this is from, but apparently, it was a goaltender who scored a length of the field goal. The ball went about 80-90 yards down field before bouncing over the other goaltender' s head and into the net. It was No. 1 on ESPN's Not Top Ten plays. What's funny is the play was No. 1 the day before on the Top Ten. I'd like to find the video.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't know what soccer league this is from, but apparently, it was a goaltender who scored a length of the field goal. The ball went about 80-90 yards down field before bouncing over the other goaltender' s head and into the net. It was No. 1 on ESPN's Not Top Ten plays. What's funny is the play was No. 1 the day before on the Top Ten. I'd like to find the video.

I think this is the one, your looking for.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think this is the one, your looking for.

ESPN ran the list again just before 7:30 last night and it was bumped down to No, 2. No. 1 was Louisiana-Lafayette playing the last 11 seconds of a basketball game against Western Kentucky with six players on the floor and the referees missed it. Louisiana-Lafayette scored the winning basket with two seconds left in overtime. Western Kentucky didn't find it so funny. They fired their coach.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Talking Centipede

A single guy decided life would be more fun

if he had a pet.

So he went to the pet store

and told the owner

that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion,

he finally bought a talking centipede,

(100-legged bug),

which came in a little white box

to use for his house.

He took the box back home,

found a good spot for the box,

and decided he would start off

by taking his new pet

to church with him.

So he asked the centipede

in the box,

"Would you like to go

to church with me today?

We will have a good time."

But there was no answer

from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit,

but he waited a few minutes

and then asked again,

"How about going

to church with me

and receive blessings?"

But again,

there was no answer

from his new friend and pet.

So he waited

a few minutes more,

thinking about the situation.

The guy decided

to invite the centipede

one last time.

This time he

put his face up against

the centipede ' s house and shouted,

"Hey, in there!

Would you like to go

to

church with me

and learn about God?"

{YOU ARE GOING TO LOVE THIS ....}

This time,

a little voice

came out of the box,

"I heard you the first time!

I'm putting my shoes on!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...