Jump to content
The Official Site of the Montréal Canadiens
Canadiens de Montreal

Are You Ready For A Good Laugh?


rosalie52
 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 3.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Posted Images

In New York, a woman is running for the state assembly. Her opponent is her ex-husband. So you can imagine the mudsling that's going to take place.

As long as it doesn't get too personal. :D

If your going to crash your car, don't crash your $225,000 Lamborghini Gallardo, people will laugh at you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As long as it doesn't get too personal. :D

If your going to crash your car, don't crash your $225,000 Lamborghini Gallardo, people will laugh at you.

When I was on the road,I once saw a brand new Ferreri hitting a bus ,the bus pulled out where it shouldn't have,the guy was just driving home from the dealership,with his new pride and joy then it was totaled.Your guy obviously lost control more money than sense.

GO HABS GO :D :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest archey

As long as it doesn't get too personal. :D

If your going to crash your car, don't crash your $225,000 Lamborghini Gallardo, people will laugh at you.

this road is like 7 miles away from me...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Tennessee - Two drunks were so angry about not getting enough onions with their McDonalds cheeseburgers that they threw bricks through the windows.

Don't get enough onions? Throw bricks to show your displeasure,,,,,ahhhh the logic of it all :blink::lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest habs1952

Don't get enough onions? Throw bricks to show your displeasure,,,,,ahhhh the logic of it all :blink::lol:

Makes one wonder what they're gonna do when they learn it's not real cheese on their burgers. Throw cement blocks? :lol: :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I hope UCE sees it. :lol:

I saw it, good engineer joke... got a few more that are good ones too..

Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."


To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.


A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such ineptitude!" The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him." "Hi George. Say, what's with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special prayer for them tonight." The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them." The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"


There's a lot more, but not for now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Alright, two more..

Three engineers were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last one said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"


An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girl friend, but a talking frog...that's cool."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest archey

Dubuque, Iowa - A drunk driver gets pulled over with a small zebra and a parrot in his pickup truck.

BOY OH MAN

i want this case...i will become a lawyer to defend this guy..PUT THE CASE ON HOLD!!!! :P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...