kinot-1 Posted October 17, 2012 Report Share Posted October 17, 2012 For UCE. Engineer joke To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. This guy goes to the doctors' & says; "Doctor, I dreamt one night that I was a wigwam, & the next night that I was a teepee!" The doctor says......."I think you're becoming too tense!" I was talking to a girl in the bar last night. She said, "If you lost 10 pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to those girls over there." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest archey Posted October 18, 2012 Report Share Posted October 18, 2012 For UCE. Engineer joke To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. This guy goes to the doctors' & says; "Doctor, I dreamt one night that I was a wigwam, & the next night that I was a teepee!" The doctor says......."I think you're becoming too tense!" I was talking to a girl in the bar last night. She said, "If you lost 10 pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right." I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to those girls over there." i totally don't get the second joke. although after signing out and thinking about it it came to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 18, 2012 Report Share Posted October 18, 2012 Batman can't stay out of trouble. Once again, he has been arrested, this time for obstructing police business - not leaving the scene of an accident in which the police were trying to locate the driver. This is the sam Batman who was hanging upside down from a building in Michigan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Backward punt in a Texas high school football game one week ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Beaverton, Oregon - After a woman is arrested for DUI, a hamster is taken into protective custody. It took three officers to capiture the furry passenger and take it to a vetenarian where the suspect picked it up after being released from police custody. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest archey Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Beaverton, Oregon - After a woman is arrested for DUI, a hamster is taken into protective custody. It took three officers to capiture the furry passenger and take it to a vetenarian where the suspect picked it up after being released from police custody. ai yes. i do believe that oregon law covers most furry mammels that are involved in dui. BUT. and i do mean BUT. i could ask my cousin who is a lawyer in oregon and actually talk to him for the first time in 35 years. then again.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 http://youtu.be/Zi8zGmIbXYc NFL Bloopers 2012 Part 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kinot-1 Posted October 21, 2012 Report Share Posted October 21, 2012 A man goes into a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!" The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my seeing-eye dog." "Oh man, " the bartender says, "I'm sorry, here, the first one's on me." The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door. Another guy walks into the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says "You can't bring that dog in here unless you tell him it's a seeing-eye dog." The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you can't bring that dog in here!" The second man replies "This is my seeing-eye dog." The bartender says, "No, I don't think so. They do not have Chihuahuas as seeing-eye dogs." The man pauses for a half-second and replies "What?!?! They gave me a Chihuahua?!?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 22, 2012 Report Share Posted October 22, 2012 Charlotte County, Florida - An excuse that's been used before and will be used again, a man who was arrested for possession of Oxycodone pilles found in his pants tries to claim the pants were not his. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 23, 2012 Report Share Posted October 23, 2012 Got a chuckle out of this story. Make sure you watch the video. http://www.sync-blog.com/sync/2012/10/the-scariest-elevator-ride-of-your-life.html Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kinot-1 Posted October 23, 2012 Report Share Posted October 23, 2012 Got a chuckle out of this story. Make sure you watch the video. http://www.sync-blog.com/sync/2012/10/the-scariest-elevator-ride-of-your-life.html i think I would have had a heart attack. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 23, 2012 Report Share Posted October 23, 2012 Syracuse, New York - If you didn't get all your money, it would make sense to return to the bank, provided it is to get the rest of your pay. Only trouble was, this was a bank robber who returned to the scene of the crime to complain the bank shortchanged him of the $20,000 he demanded during his first visit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 23, 2012 Report Share Posted October 23, 2012 CBS sportscaster makes an on air blunder by calling the Kansas City Chiefs the Kings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddienmike Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 guess what it's me I am here at last,still no got new puter but this one at least gets me here,no hockey to talk about, but I really missed you lot. Mike and i were driving through Van City when we saw this older sort of guy walking down the road with a new laffs jersey on he didn't have long hair but a really long grey beard,Mike said he had still had his playoof beard feom the last time the Laffs were in the playoffs,then he said he looked sort of familiar he thought he recognised him playing for the Laffs last season,that made me really laugh. It's really good to be back,I really missed you all I have a lot of reading to catch up on. GO HABS GO soon please :wacko: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kinot-1 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 guess what it's me I am here at last,still no got new puter but this one at least gets me here,no hockey to talk about, but I really missed you lot. Mike and i were driving through Van City when we saw this older sort of guy walking down the road with a new laffs jersey on he didn't have long hair but a really long grey beard,Mike said he had still had his playoof beard feom the last time the Laffs were in the playoffs,then he said he looked sort of familiar he thought he recognised him playing for the Laffs last season,that made me really laugh. It's really good to be back,I really missed you all I have a lot of reading to catch up on. GO HABS GO soon please :wacko: Welcome back Maddie,,,I thought we would have to send out an APB for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HabsRuleForever Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 guess what it's me I am here at last,still no got new puter but this one at least gets me here,no hockey to talk about, but I really missed you lot. Mike and i were driving through Van City when we saw this older sort of guy walking down the road with a new laffs jersey on he didn't have long hair but a really long grey beard,Mike said he had still had his playoof beard feom the last time the Laffs were in the playoffs,then he said he looked sort of familiar he thought he recognised him playing for the Laffs last season,that made me really laugh. It's really good to be back,I really missed you all I have a lot of reading to catch up on. GO HABS GO soon please :wacko: Welcome back Maddie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 Another story I heard was someone stole a rowboat from Wal-Mart and got caught when he went back for the oars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THEBIGGESTHABSFAN123 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 guess what it's me I am here at last,still no got new puter but this one at least gets me here,no hockey to talk about, but I really missed you lot. Mike and i were driving through Van City when we saw this older sort of guy walking down the road with a new laffs jersey on he didn't have long hair but a really long grey beard,Mike said he had still had his playoof beard feom the last time the Laffs were in the playoffs,then he said he looked sort of familiar he thought he recognised him playing for the Laffs last season,that made me really laugh. It's really good to be back,I really missed you all I have a lot of reading to catch up on. GO HABS GO soon please :wacko: Welcome back Maddie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 Manatee County, Florida - If you're going to burglarize homes, it helps to know the neighborhood and a plan B if your escape doesn't go as planned. These two 19 year old burglars got lost in the neighborhood and accidently returned to the house they just robbed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CANADIENS27 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 Arkansas punt return for a touchdown against Tennessee on Novermber 13, 2011. If you're wondering why I would post a punt return on this thread, it's being posted for some shoddy tackling that should resulted in a 10 yard loss into a 60 yard return for a Razorback touchdown. Three in all, after the Arkansas returner cut back against pursuit who had the angle on him. Usually, the defense wins. Not this time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forever_Habs10 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 Go ahead....make me laugh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest archey Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 Go ahead....make me laugh 50,000... the money on the bets needs to go back into circulation. hurry it up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forever_Habs10 Posted October 24, 2012 Report Share Posted October 24, 2012 Another story I heard was someone stole a rowboat from Wal-Mart and got caught when he went back for the oars. lmao Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest habs1952 Posted October 25, 2012 Report Share Posted October 25, 2012 Go ahead....make me laugh You can do that on your own. Look in the mirror. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HabsRuleForever Posted October 25, 2012 Report Share Posted October 25, 2012 You can do that on your own. Look in the mirror. Ouch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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