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rosalie52
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Forsythe County, Georgia - If you think the line at the McDonald's drivethrough is moving too slowly, what do you? This cop was obviously starving and in a hurry, so this sargaent thought it would be a good idea to confront the driver at the front of the line by putting a gun to his neck blaming the driver for holding up the line. The officer has been place on paid administrative leave.

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Tacoma, Washington - Police have been ordered to give marijuana back to its rightful owner. A driver had been pulled for driving without a license and possession of marijuana. The charges were dismissed after state voters decided to legalize pot in small amounts. The driver then asked for the weed back and provided proof medical marijuana authorization, but the city refused. It was then the judge gave the city seven days to comply or be held in contempt of court. If the case is not settled, it could go to a higher court.

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Eunice, Louisiana - LSU cornerback and NFL prospect Tharold Simon has been arrested for intimidating an officer after he was asked to move his car that was blocking a street. Before moving his vehicle, the police report states Simon said "I own Eunice" and "I'm going to buy these projects" and "you're going to be mine." The report also states he backed his car up in an agressive manner, spun his wheels,and turned his car radio all the way up. The police report further states the player had the mayor on his side and the officer would be fired if he wrote a ticket.

Simon is charged with intimidation of an officer, resisting an officer, blocking a passageway, and unnecessary noise violation. Simon's agent says his client is completely innocent and is contemplatinng legal action against the police department.

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Guest habs1952

Eunice, Louisiana - LSU cornerback and NFL prospect Tharold Simon has been arrested for intimidating an officer after he was asked to move his car that was blocking a street. Before moving his vehicle, the police report states Simon said "I own Eunice" and "I'm going to buy these projects" and "you're going to be mine." The report also states he backed his car up in an agressive manner, spun his wheels,and turned his car radio all the way up. The police report further states the player had the mayor on his side and the officer would be fired if he wrote a ticket.

Simon is charged with intimidation of an officer, resisting an officer, blocking a passageway, and unnecessary noise violation. Simon's agent says his client is completely innocent and is contemplatinng legal action against the police department.

Idiot. <_<

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Manatee County, Florida - A 39 year old man buys a "Jail Sucks" tshirt complete with an illustration of an angry inmate behind bars get arrested. It seems he was one of 39 suspects who got caught in a sting operation targeting food stamp fraud. According to police, the profits were used to buy alcohol and drugs.

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Port Angeles, Washington - If you don't like a neighbor's fenceline getting too close to your house, what do you do? This 51 year old man decided to take matters into his own hands by ramming a bulldozer into four houses knocking one off its foundation, knocking down at least one telephone pole, cutting off power to the entire neibhborhood, and destroying a pickup truck. In the words one person, ' he went nuts.' He is looking at chargings of malicious mischief.

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Kennewick, Washington - A 22 year old woman steals an SUV from an apartment complex and drives to the MacDonald's drive through where the owner happened to be working. She was arrested but her male passenger wasn't. Police also found items with security tags still attached from J.C. Penny's and Sears.

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One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.
Pretty Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, “Don’t you know who I am?”
The man replied, “Yep, sure do.”
Satan asked, “Aren’t you going to run?”
“Nope, sure ain’t,” said the man.
Perturbed, Satan asked, “Why aren’t you afraid of me?”
The man calmly replied, “Been married to your sister for over 48 years.

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Oregon (if I heard correctly) - A 41 year old man breaks into an unlocked SUV and steals a smart phone, laptop computer, and some other item and leaves the smart phone on. When the couple discovered the they had been robbed, they turned on the GPS system to locate the thief. When the police caught with him, he was sound asleep in his car with the smart phone in the trunk.

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From Jay Leno,,,headlines:

Renovators come to renovate a house

Build warming fire in carport

Carport catches fire

They bring in backhoe to pull the carport away from the house

Tree catches on fire

Bring in chainsaw to cut down tree.

Tree falls on house.

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Lighthouse Point, Florida - A burglar loots a house for laptops, medications, and various other electronics into a suitcase. After being spotted, he flees and while being chased by a polilce helicopter, our suspect stops in another for two bottles of beer. He discarded them during the chase before being cornered by a K-9 dog and allegedly punched the dog.

The suspect is charged with burglary, grand theft, punching a police dog, and resisting arrest with violence.

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